a Fan on Facebook, You’re last post sound so discouraged. Please remember we have just had a major energy shift and everyone, including you, is trying to find their feet. The work you do is so amazing and important. You are influencing so many more people than know. Donna Isaac
Thank you for the kind words.
It is as it is supposed to be.
My ego has been taken out
for everyone to see.
The delusions of thinking
one has the answers
is offset by few wanting to share them
and thus taking the sense of knowing
“What is right”
out of the picture,
I have lived in a magical thinking world
of what could be for a bit longer
than my finances could afford
with the mistaken belief
that others would
come to help eventually.
I just did not anticipate
it would take so long and I
do not wish to give up the last of what i have
when there is nothing trending in my direction
other than the collapse of the economy
and the growing future need for this.
But the public is blind for the most part,
or more precisely, anesthetized and trapped,
unwilling to pull the needle out of the vein
that keeps them comfy
or to make a sacrifice to help
pull the needles from the arms
of others too weak to do it
but desirous all the same.
In time the effects of my attempt
to wake people up
will dribble down the slow
but sadly, the time is not on our side
in our favor for just waiting
for others to take care
of the problems we’ve created in our lives.
We cause through daily actions,
All the problems we observe,
instead of the solutions
we pay homage to the crimes.
When everyone is comfy,
has the things they want or need,
why bother then with changing?
It’s the nature of our greed.
People acclimate to lifestyles
Never want to feel the pain,
rather turn than face the challenge,
rather take then give away.
Though it is in fact not pain
but a freeing in the end,
like the pricking of the puss filled sore,
lets out poisoned pain instead.
Still, I’ve pushed so many buttons,
And found my thoughts offend,
so I think its time to go back in
to stealth and hide again.
Let the world do as it pleases.
If the thought was so darn good,
it will grow and some will follow
with this knowledge for their food.
I pray someone will rise to help.
And do more than I have.
I am not asking, or inviting,
to be made a fool by men.
I accept that in the masses
who will watch me as this dies
cheering that they were not joining
with a loser as he fries.
I accept that just in trying
to do this rather than not,
sacrificing everything I have
is not enough to help.
If they want it now,
They’ll make it
Do it all amongst themselves,
but at least they have a road map.
Freely given in advance.
I have had $125 donated to help this cause over the last 8 years. No more. I have done a lot with that support I think, especially because I did not even cash the check for $25 because she needed it more than me. Her thought was worth more than the money could have done for what I owe to make this happen.
It is time to recognize the folly of my illusion I could know what people would want if it was made available nearly for free. Most would rather endure being unhappy doing what they need to do to fulfill debt commitments made rather than the experience their life unlived.
Someday they will perhaps Awaken and come to life, experience the fact that having less frees one from sustaining the costs of all we think we need to own to be happy or fit into the society we have trapped ourselves into believing we need to be part of to be happy.
We have to do what keeps body and soul together, while still living a life true to our hearts. I hope there is some grace and ease around this for you somewhere.
There is, indeed sweet grace there is,
for I shall go back to what was nearest
and dearest to me as a child,
to write my thoughts in peace and quiet,
to draw pictures and create,
to live life in space where I enjoy
not being attacked for being different
than the rest of the people I would meet in life.
This is the guidance that comes from above
For the ego and intent,
it is the forces that teach and lead us to
the places we are sent.
My son led the life I wished I could
and died when I knew in my heart I would.
Now living more than twice his age,
I realized why I dreaded that date
The one I thought was my doomed fate.
And with it the desires changed
Not a life of making money every day
at the price of never doing what I swore my life too do,
no way to make back payments missed,
or simply give it all away.
So few appreciate
what it can truly be
enough to do the work
that the proof of faith requires.
For success in any fashion,
manifesting a great dream
as large as mine,
can not be done alone.
I have lived so much of my life
isolated from the world
that didn’t have a clue,
I did not know.
I was oblivious how deeply
Apathy had taken root.
And that no one even thinks
They can break free.
I am thrilled so many heard me
And seen what I have to give.
It was sad I could not call more.
Who would choose this way to live?
I regret that I am leaving
And will not be there to have
to build a house too cheap to make a living at
for 15 years to stay a slave.
I never signed up for that,
only to plant the seedlings,
my images of what can be,
my proofs I felt would wake Mankind
to the calling of their Souls.
Some have opened their pineal gland
to the possibilities that are in line
with their purpose and their being
on this planet for this life.
The roots of my seedlings,
planted in the cells of grey,
ignite the fires of conscience now,
in spite of all who sway.
This is the sad beginning
of a new phase of my life.
I am happy to be giving,
full of joy, without a wife.
I consider life a blessing
and I dare not waste a bit
as I try to get the people
just to build a house that fits.
Tis all I have to give you see,
to complete the book I wrote.
The next Book has come into view,
and thus it must be told.
What others can not see at all,
as I did not till Adam left,
was that in passing far beyond our reach,
we will want what we can’t have.
I finally saw the writing,
as I needed for so long,
was truly most important,
not the houses once their done.
With the village manifested
I can now go on to do,
what I started out so long ago,
when given life anew.
Tis the time for manifesting
that which ties this all into,
the longest lasting story
any man has yet infused.
I shall leave it in the Psyche
of the world that we know now.
Its the things that are yet coming
that I see will mean the most.
Its the quantum story growing
in the many forms it takes,
as the roots awake the people
to take action in my wake.
I would rather not be crucified
upon the public stage,
yet as I write my book I know
the fate will come one day.
This is a testing as I start,
with open breast aware,
that the armor I have worn in past
is open, my chest bare.
My sword is sheathed,
My shield is down.
I Love as freely as I can,
I give more of me every day,
but change my focus now.
The tide has turned another way.
I chose to sacrifice this lamb,
this business I have born and bred,
I give back what God gifted me,
I shared it with the flocks that care
but was amazed nobody came
to celebrate the cause du jour,
but learned there is no warming flame.
I thought they’d want to learn to build
a home for nearly free,
to have it last their whole life long.
To never be in need.
I offered up the lumber,
the windows and the doors.
I offered up the land and more
the water, lights, and store.
Yet no one came perhaps because,
I had no clue at all,
that my Don Quixote village
was illusion in the fog.
How could I think to offer up
solutions for Mankind?
I’ve even lived the way they live,
in nearly every form.
I’ve eaten from the dumpsters,
I’ve dined with rich and poor,
I’ve had all of the money
I could want,
and if wanted, could have more.
I’ve been gifted in so many ways,
with lessons large and small.
I’ve been beaten as a pacifist,
a cripple, and a while poor.
I’ve stood up to many tyrants,
many councils, and the norm.
I have changed the cities worst to best,
and given hope and more.
I have given houses,
homes for young
that no one else would help.
I have opened doors that no one saw,
and seen the change our thoughts can cause.
I’ve shaped the streets from dark to light,
grown trees where once there was just blight.
I’ve razed the dead homes
both big and small,
and built them back,
far greater still.
It seems I’ve had so many lives,
I’m thankful for each I survive.
I look ahead now at new goals,
and know much more as they unfold.
The past is for a purpose here,
not lost in anger, grief, or fear.
I have a path that this includes,
but not the total, not a ruse.
It is the story I will tell,
but more the one that will evolve.
This is the purpose of the show,
the seedlings and the path to go.
It is the Truth that must come forth,
and for that I must change my course.
I thank you for your kindest words,
your love and very deep concerns.
I feel them more than any know.
It is the reason I must go.
I chart the path, but that is all,
I can not take you, simply lead.
I can ignite your light within,
a candle lights a thousand then,
at some point every candle dies,
but leaves behind a million lights.
If that is what I came to do,
my tiny houses sown in You,
and if it lights your flame within,
then truly only you can win.
For now in flames of passion deep,
you will alight and wake from sleep.
The shock of death is hard to bear,
the grief of knowing all is gone.
The loss of dreams one held so dear,
awakens spirit lost in fear.
The fear of losing things like cars,
jewelry, houses, bank accounts,
the thought of that can not compare
, to losing that which you hold dear.
Your dreams of Love and Freedom,
to just be with those who care,
to express your soul thus freely,
and create your wildest dream.
To love without society
condemning who you choose.
To be the person you could be,
not fear what you could lose.
Thus comes the end of TTH,
a thought I made come true.
It will still send many seedlings out,
as images for you.
I will try to plant in 20 houses
what I think you know,
that the answer is not in my work,
but what mankind will do.
A carpenter can only craft
the finest stairs to see,
but he can not make the people climb,
or be what they could be.
I fell into an easy trap,
the ego and the I,
and soon the forms they took will pass,
much like the reasons why.
The reasons will be obvious,
one day when looking back.
But for now they are the path I take,
on my ever speeding track.
I can see the Light that guides me though
the destiny is far,
I will follow without wavering,
until the Light is gone.
Whew. Not ready to publish first draft
but yours for the moment as you inspired it.
I Need to do a rewrite,
but thank you for your energy today.
Your words do indeed inspire,
so never hold them back.
This is what Bakhtinian Dialogism is about,
and the quantum story can be crafted
if the mind is just aware,
but the thoughts will slip past most who see
and the loss will all be theirs.
Thank you for Being there.